Wheel Drawings and Compatibility July 22, 2020
Years of experience have proven to me that most marriages and relationships fail because of unmet expectations. After two failed marriages I began studying compatibility. I learned to identify personality traits from handwriting strokes.
My first marriage happened when I was an aviator in the Korean War. We met at a college social center called the Cabin in the Woods. I was 22 and she was an 18-year-old student in Georgia
That evening I met many attractive girls. Yet in my daybook, all my notes were about just one girl named Naunie. I had time to date her for two months while I was taken off flight status for an injury. I was healing from burst ear drums suffered in a steep decent in a jet. We called her family to say we were getting married and wanted their blessing. Except for her grandmother, none were happy. Grandmother proclaimed, “’Bout time, I married at fifteen.” Her father, Mr. Bob exclaimed, “Damn Valdosta! I sent her there to keep her away from all the boys at the University of Georgia.”
After the wedding, I had a month of military leave for a honeymoon up the East Coast.
After visiting friends, family and sightseeing, Naunie waved goodbye as I boarded a military transport to Sub-Arctic Goose Airbase in Labrador, Canada.
I was assigned to the remote Goose Airbase for one year. The base commander sent Naunie an engraved invitation to visit.
Naunie arrived in a snow storm on August 1, 1954.
Our room was in an old WWII wood barracks. Our marriage bed was two army cots tied together. Wooden orange crates served as table and chairs. This is where our first child was conceived.
The next spring I left Goose with a one-month leave to be with Naunie. Unfortunately, our daughter Thiery was born after I had to return to work at Paine Air Force Base in Washington State.
Six weeks passed before I saw the baby. Holding her for the first time was a magical moment. We started family life in an apartment near the base. Soon Naunie was pregnant again. In the spring of ‘56 we departed Paine so I could complete my degree at Harvard. Son Bruce arrived in May, only eleven months after his sister was born.
We bought our first home with the GI Bill and I began classes in Cambridge. I flew part-time for the Air National Guard. Two years after Bruce, our second daughter Terre Jane arrived. I began selling real estate during my senior year.
After two years of real estate sales, we moved to Long Island, New York. I commuted to New York City to learn the insurance business.
Naunie wanted to return to Georgia. My commuting five hours a day to and from work was too much. We moved to Atlanta and I was a citizen-soldier alternating between civilian occupations and military duty.
Approaching age forty in ‘71, I took up Hatha yoga. I felt twenty-two again. Our fourth child, Rebecca, was born fourteen years after our third.
My flying missions ended after Rebecca’s birth. I moved my office into our home so I could feed, burp, change, rock and play with her. I also had a new hobby, scientific handwriting analysis. I took my time to enjoy it and didn’t rush to complete my certification. I became a certified Graphoanalyst with the International Graphoanalysts Society (IGAS) in 1976 and a Certified Graphologist with the American Association of Handwriting Analysts (AAHA) in 2016.
Naunie became active teaching and counseling evenings at home when she was not traveling.
I’m an early riser and Naunie was a night person. We were conflicted and it was not improved with counseling. She filed for divorce. It was legally settled in 1978.
Years later I grew to understand that building a relationship before children could hold a couple together. We had three decades of responsibility for children while the Air Force continuously separated us. It is too late to begin spending time together after the children are grown.
I met Sara at the Fred Astaire Dance Studio. She had three sons and three failed marriages. I had four children. I felt my family didn’t care about me or what I did. Sara and I were married by a justice of the peace with no family present. We had little in common and our children didn’t get along. Trying to be nice I took three years to end what should have never started.
Single again I began a serious study of compatibility. I developed a checklist to compare areas of interest including religious belief and practice, health, education and values. I used handwriting analysis to complete personality profiles of prospective companions. I met other singles at dance groups. I tried the personal ads in magazines. I had girlfriends, including one that lasted over six years. We enjoyed good times, mutual respect and love but never lived together. We parted amicably when we wanted different things.
After seventeen years of single life, I met Betty Ann, newly widowed. I met her selling health insurance. We started dating. I didn’t want to spend a lot of time without having a sense that we fit. She declined my offer of a compatibility study, but I continued to see her.
After two years of being together we were ready for traditional marriage. Both families attended our wedding of January ‘98. We’re married to this day.
I collaborated with Dr. Ernest Pecci, a Board Certified Psychiatrist, in 2008. Dr. Pecci is the founder of the wheel projective technique derived from the Hindu Mandala. A spontaneous wheel drawing quickly uncovers a person’s self-image, coping with life and relating to others. In 2010 we published the book Quick and Incisive Personality Profiling. It combines wheel drawings with handwriting analyses that identify personality traits. The subject’s wheel drawing and handwriting samples validate each other and give insights the other can’t.
I had clients and friends complete samples. The first two wheels I wanted analyzed were for Betty Ann and me. Dr. Pecci discussed her wheel drawing with me after looking at it briefly. Her wheel drawing was less spontaneous. She wouldn’t let me have it until she finished what resembled a wagon wheel. It was perfectly round and centered on the 8.5” x 11″ piece of paper. It had eight spokes. She filled in the double lines forming the rim, spokes and hub. The shading was dark from retracing. The hub was a donut. Pecci concluded, “She’s a perfect perfectionist you would want to hire because she gets everything right. She likes being strong.She has carefully constructed her view of the world, her beliefs. If you take out one of the spokes then things fall apart.”
I gained new insights about her that I didn’t have after living together for ten years. She was raised Baptist. She would get very upset whenever I discussed life after death or my first wife’s psychic circle at the Foundation of Truth. When I attended the Congregational Church Sunday School as a child, the message was Jesus loves me and follow his example.
Pecci continued saying, “Her shading shows she does everything with a lot of emotion. She’s not shy about saying what she likes. She has to know she’s a good person.”
Her handwriting confirmed Pecci’s analysis of her wheel. For example, even spacing between letters and words, balanced margins and centered writing.
Next, Dr. Pecci looked at my wheel. It was round and large with a double rim, spokes and a hub with a black dot in the middle. He quickly told me that I had lots of energy and that I was an extrovert (large wheel). I had confusion from too many interests (nine spokes). The donut center showed some inconsistencies in parenting (I never saw my father angry, my mother was the disciplinarian). I was inclined to go along with the opposite sex’s wishes (darkened center of the hub).
Two years later my wheel changed. Only the rim had double lines (protection from too much outside influence). Eight single spoke lines showed my great sensitivity interacting with others that Betty Ann didn’t know. The clear hub showed I was open to spiritual growth, and the spoke lines entering the hub was evidence of introspection.
Combining spontaneous wheel drawings with handwriting samples is a powerful tool to quickly understand ourselves and others. The wheel may change over time, alerting us to what’s going on. I have a passion for exploring personalities. It never gets boring.